My boyfriend, 51, has been trying it on with my daughter, 29, behind my back – she’s deeply uncomfortable

DEAR DEIDRE: MY partner has been putting on a show for my daughter behind my back, but he says I’m the one with the dirty mind.

He hugged her from behind, pressed his body against her, gave her “goodnight neck snacks” and bought her expensive jewelry.

She was very uncomfortable with his attention and was struggling with how to tell me.

The last straw came when he “accidentally” dropped his towel in front of her and looked into her eyes.

I am 49 years old, and my partner is 51 years old. We have been together for 11 years.

My daughter is 29 years old and recently moved back in with us after breaking up with her boyfriend.

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She tried to refuse the expensive necklace he bought her, but he said it was just an early birthday present to cheer her up.

But then he told her to keep it from me.

He spoke to her in a sexually inappropriate manner, asked if her boyfriend had satisfied him sexually and spoke of his own “insatiable libido.”

When I noticed that my daughter would leave the room whenever my boyfriend came in, I sat her down and demanded to know what was going on.

She really didn’t want to talk, but I got the truth out of her.

When I confronted him, he erupted and accused me of being twisted and my daughter of lying.

He rushed off to live with his parents and I had little contact with him other than a weekend together to try to patch things up.

He admits that his actions may have been “misconstrued,” but he can’t provide an adequate explanation.

My daughter says she will leave if he comes back. I do not know what to do.

DEIDRE SAYS: What a terrible position for your partner to put your daughter in.

And how upsetting it is to be let down by someone you love.

Of course you will feel confused and stressed. I’m afraid there’s no way you’ll trust him until your boyfriend at least explains himself to you.

But you risk losing your daughter if you continue this relationship. Is that a price worth paying?

You could find another partner, but she could never find another mom.

You might want to talk to Rape Crisis who can give you advice about unwanted sexual attention (rapecrisis.org.uk, 0808 500 2222).